THE MAUVE KINGDOM

Life in an Apartment Leased by a University for Residence

GREETINGS POOR SOULS. BEHOLD, I SHALL ENLIGHTEN YOU. AND YEA, YOU SHALL BE ENLIGHTENED.... Well, I'm in Residence... Yeap... an in town residence leased by the school for two years. Its pretty clean, which is a bonus, and theres brand new appliances, and a stove that has digital heating. I have two roomates, but more about them later when I develop appropriate nick names. There are four floors, and I am on the forth floor. we still need a mircrowave, and I hate coin operated laundry, but other then that its awsome. Other good news about the place, I live directly above the Cowgirl-Scientist and the Queen of Shron. This pleases me. and I have a blacony. I won a drinking container today at orientation. I plan to put it to good use, that is, I plan to fill it with Ice Tea.... mmmmmm, ice tea.... sweet nector of the gods... mmmmmm...
anyways, another list

Top Ten Free Things to get from the University

10. Thermal Mug.... mmmm, ice tea... sweet nector of the gods... mmmm
9. Pizza.... mmmm, pizzza.... sweet ambrosia of the gods...
8. Planner.... mmmm.... wait, thats not food based...
7. International Student ID... now were ever I go, I am officially known as dirt cheep
6. industructable water bottle... mmmmm, ice tea... sweet nector of the gods... mmmm
5. Credenzas.... well, the University doesn't actually 'know' that their giving them away... but they are any ways... nugde nudge, wink wink, say no more
4. Condoms... not that I you know... you know... but... they make great ballons
3. UBC ID cards.... yes, yet anouther peice of plastic that benifits me in no way whatso ever
2. Various t-shirts related to leadership, creativity, Cheese, diversity, ect ect
and the



and the number one most bestest thinga-ma-jig is.....



1) The bookmark of things everystudent should get down... cause after four years in school, theres no way a bunch of upperclassmen could know what the hell their doing...




which leads us to...
Complaint #9
Issue: Inappropriate use of the word condom
Response: Well I'm not *paying* for ballons!

Complaint #10
Issue: too much subtle passive aggressive sarcasm directed at school...
Response: Bite me, Margret Pipper....

posted by King O' Mauve @ 1:17 PM